Some Thoughts!

I was contemplating today thinking.......thinking.......
I posted a few days ago about how fearful I was of flying. It is something I have not done for a long time....16 years.....too long, I know. But you know when you don't do something for a long time and those thoughts of doubt creep in and you find yourself thinking you can't do something and then you don't. You end up missing out on opportunities to grow and excel because of FEAR! I know that Satan will fill us with doubt and fear. And then we take it from there. We doubt ourselves and our great ability to succeed. As we took off from Salt Lake City in the plane tuesday night. i felt my heart pounding as the nerves took over. And then we were off the ground. I realized that I used to think it felt cool to take off, but I dreaded the time in between. I am the opposite now. Taking off and landing made me feel sick, but I really enjoyed the journey in between. Life is alot like that. We can dread things so much that we don't want to take the journey. But if we just breathe in and start on the path, the journey can be so enjoyable. Life is about the journey. There are things that will come in and knock us around and make us feel unsure (like the taking off and the landing did for me) but we just keep going because sometimes the best part is just when you think..."let me off"...it levels off and we go.."wow...this is pretty amazing"
I had forgotten how pretty flying can be. We flew at night and you could see every star with clarity. I loved looking out the window and wondering where we were and what was going on in the lives of those in the houses below. In the plane, they have the ability to track the flight and watch where you are. Wouldnt that be nice in life, to see where you are. Are you on course, is your heading going in another direction? We do have that ability with scriptures, prayer and the companionship of the Holy Ghost. I have let my compass slide a bit. I am pretty close to being on course, but I have deviated away from the constant blessing of having the spirit at all times. I need to rectify that.
I was talking to my sister the other day. She has a friend who's husband is a Stake President. She made the comment that he will not do anything in his life to jeopardize having the spirit with him. He will walk out of movies, turn of media etc if it causes him to not have the spirit. He said, it takes him days to have it back again and he needs to have that spirit of dicernment and the ability to receive answers and to be able to know the intent of people in an instant. How often to we justify our spiritual selves in saying "oh, it was great, except that one part"Or do you ever think about the things that tempt you and just linger a little longer on longing for those things that you should? I am coming to believe that when we linger longer where satan wants us, we DESIRE to linger there more and more until we find ourselves walking amongst and partaking of those things that will keep us from our Father in Heaven.
Enjoy the journey. Keep safe from the things of the world, Strenghthen selves and keep being a great example!!

Vacation

I am sooooooo excited to go on a vacation tomorrow! Yeah. Kris and I are headed to Maine for some much needed rest and relaxation! We are so excited to go back to the East Coast and to see the sights. We are so blessed to be able to have this time to go away together and to just have a bit of fun! Is it bad to say that I am excited to be taking time off work? I think I am ready for summer! I don't think I am as burned out this year as I was last year but wow...I am ready for the break!
So I i will post pictures of our trip and keep you updated!! Fun Fun!!

overcoming fears

How do you overcome a fear? My big fear, aside from losing a child or husband, is the fear of flying. I have always been scared of it. I think it it mainly the thought of plumeting out of the sky from 30,000 ft. Kris and I are flying to the east coast next week....ever since I found out we were going, I have been waking up at night with the anxiety associated with flying. So, I will have my xanax refilled before we go. I am TOTALLY excited for the trip and I am good with the take off and the landing...its just the time in between. I am trying to psych my brain out but it is just always there, nagging! :)
So, if you have some great advice, let me know...SOON!

spring

I have been accused of NOT keeping our blog current. Can you imagine such a thing. Well, it is probably due to the fact that our home computer is out of commission for a while. You see, we got a virus..then another and then another. Well, we had to completely wipe the machine clean and start again. Easy, right? Apparently not to be! We reinstalled everything and were up and working until this annoying little message came up saying that we could no longer log on due to the fact that our key code for windows vista was no longer valid...HUH??? WHAT??? I mean, we purchased the machine with vista installed and the key code is right there on the side of the machine..so why is it not valid? Another one of the mysteries of the fleecing of america microsoft style! So when I went online to acer's customer support, they said...."your warrenty is expired, please call us" So when you call it says "for a fee of $60.00 for the first hour, we can help you" Again......HUH? WHAT?????? Notice the sarcasm at this point? So, we are back to square one...we can't even talk to a live person...how insane is that?
Well, I think we will just dump vista and reinstall xp or something....completely ridiculous. So in the mean time, no computer, no internet, no microsoft office......nothing. It is like having a decorative black box on a table. So nice and useless.
Anyway...
Onto nicer topics. It is SPRING and I have SPRING fever BIG TIME!!!!! I am ready for the school year to come to a close. I am ready to play and read and relax. I am ready for NO MORE SNOW!!!! (yet, I think we still have a bit more....is it just me, or does winter seem to be hanging on longer these days)
Kris and I are going on a little vacation next week though and then I have women's conf at BYU the last week of April to look forward to. I need a spiritual boost!
The kids are doing good. Learning life lessons, learning about being peacable teenagers...lol! Making decisions, being good!
The dogs are good. We have not seen another racoon yet. Hopefully we won't, however, I refuse to let Zoe out in the middle of the night now. And, as a result, she seems to be sleeping more in the night and I am getting more sleep too...maybe that was a blessing in disguise!
Let us know how you are! and enjoy this SPRING time! It is glorious to marvel in the waking world!

RACOONS!

Oh my
It was probably one of the worst nights I have had, last night. I got up around 2 to let the dogs out. Of course, Zoe wanted to just BOLT out the door and go see what she could find. Well, about 10 minutes later, I heard growling and barking and commotion. When I got out side, both dogs were up near the fence in the shrubs going absolutely crazy. They were barking and growling and whimpering. I yelled and tried to get them to come out. Eventually Zeus did and he ran for the house. When I found him later, he was cowering in a corner. Zoe, on the other hand, was not going to budge from where she was. I had no idea what kind of creature she was battling but it SOUNDED horrible! I had to go wake Kris and eventually Nick, too. Kris came out and by that time, Zoe was in the WATER! She was battling a RACOON!! It was one of the worst sounding things I have ever heard and witnessed. She was grabbing the coon by the neck and whipping it all around in the water and then it would get loose and try to scratch her and bite her. We could NOT get her out of the water. Too make a very long and very scary story short....we eventually got a rope lassoed around her front leg and finally got her over to the bank where Kris and Nick got a hold of her and got her out of the water. We got her in the house and into the tub. She was soaked through and was bleeding. We bathed her and put peroxide on her cuts and she just ran around the house. I think she was so riled up she didnt know how to settle down. I have NEVER seen her like this!! CRAZY !!!! At anyrate, we called the vet today, her shots are current so that is a good sign, but we have to watch for her if she becomes lethargic or moody. I dont dare let her go into the back yard. I would be surprised if that racoon lived. I am afraid if she finds it again, dead or alive, it will not be a good thing. We are having someone come and set traps tomorrow and he will scout the backyard for any traces of them. WOW!
What a night! I hope to NEVER go through that again!!

Happy March

Welcome to the month of Green, luck, mischief, etc. Also the month of my oldests birth. We celebrate Nates birthday on March 17th, St, Patricks day! I still remember the day he was born with great clarity! We had woken up to a great blizzard. My dr was supposed to fly to Wyoming to give a lecture, but due to the weather, she cancelled and called me to see if we wanted to have a baby instead. We were scheduled for a c-section that afternoon due to the fact that Nate was in a breech position with his head up under my ribs instead of down. We ventured to the hospital, there were SO many other moms in labour due to the storm front that had come through. Seriously, there were women on guerney's in the hallway waiting for a room! Crazy. At 12:58 pm, Nate arrived in the world, very stressed and not doing too well. They whisked him off the the transitional nursery where they monitored him and watched him and then they took him to the NICU where he stayed for 4 days. I wasnt able to even see him until the next day. My brother Mark took poloroid pictures of him and brought them to my room (no digital camera;s then) and that was all I had of him. I remember seeing him for the first time the next day and thinking "you are not what I expected my baby to look like" and then I just had immediate love for him. He was in an isolet with oxygen and lots of tubes and wires. Let me just say, he was 3 weeks early and weighed 9 lbs 5 oz. He was inbetween a 2 lb baby and a 4 lb baby. he looked like a sumo wrestler. He was so big that they had to tie his little arms down because he kept trying to pull all the tubes out! He is still like that today, determined, annoyed, strong willed and amazing!
It is always fun to recount the experiences you have with your first born! happy birhtday nate!
If you want to wish him a Happy Birthday, you can send him an email to monkeygrandma57@gmail.com

Entering the month of love

Happy February! Can you believe January is gone and we are emerging closer to spring. I love this time of year, admittedly, January is not my favorite month, with the exception of Jan 3, which is our anniversary. Other than that, it is a dreary, cold, back to the grind, holidays are over, kind of month. So I look with anticipation to February. I laughed last night as I was looking around and realized, my wreath is still hanging over the fireplace, their is a christmas tree (artificial) still standing watch outside the front door and our front door is still cloaked with greenery from this past Christmas season, which leads to me to believe that I am not focusing and prioritizing my life and with that, I am becoming further behind in all things.
Hence,I declare, the MONTH OF LOVE. This month I am going to try to do one act of Love each day, whether big or small, whether for self or others and I will try to blog them weekly (I would say daily, but I know myself better than that)
Wouldn't it be nice to increase our level of love in the following areas
1. Love of the Savior. What things will you do this month to increase your love of the savior? Will you read about his life, will you pray more fervently? Will you increase your charity for others? Think about it and come up with 7 things you will do. One for each day of the first week of the month
2. Love of Self. I thought about having Love for others here, but I think you need to build a foundation. Love of the Savior and Love of Self...not love of being selfish, but to connect with who you are, to nurture yourself and fill your cup so you can effectively love others-- do this for the next 7 days
3. Celebrate Valentines Day with the next step, Love of those in your immediate family. Show an increase of love for your spouse and your children. Or your significant other. What daily acts of service and support can you give them. Do this for the next 7 days.
4. Love for others, or charity--the true love of Christ. Now you are ending the month and have re established your relationship with the Savior, have begun to fill your own cup and are nurturing those around you, You can now give that out to others, Go ahead, Pay it Forward. See what happens. I believe this is where we come full circle. As we become charitable, we learn greater love of the Savior, greater love of self and greater love of those near us.
I am excited to take this adventure. If youre up to it, join me!